Emotions

Fear

Fear

Stamp your feet on the ground

And feel that you are right here, right now. You exist! You are here today! That's an achievement in itself.

Fear

Quote:

"'Fearless' is living in spite of those things that scare you to death." Taylor Swift

Fear

Ring a helpline

or send a text or email explaining how you feel. Sometimes it's really helpful to just vent to someone " “ anyone - and put your feelings into words.A problem shared is a problem halved.

Fear

Quote:

"Human beings are not designed to go through life alone. No one has to bear the burden of the tough times all by themselves."Jack Canfield

Fear

This will pass.

You won't be afraid forever.

Fear

Quote:

"This too shall pass"  King Solomon

Fear

Whatever happens

You'll be alright. You can handle this!

Fear

Quote:

"Life does not put things in front of you that you are unable to handle." Unknown

Fear

Turn your fear into a character.

Give it a face and a name. Maybe your fear is a shadowy demon, or a beautiful young woman with red eyes. When you feel yourself getting scared, picture your fear sneaking up on you or trying to win you over. Greet it mentally. This helps you separate yourself from your fear, and helps you to notice that the fear isn't you, and isn't a part of you. It's something separate that comes and goes " “ it's something that can be mastered and controlled.

Fear

Quote:

"Fear is only as deep as the mind allows."  Japanese Proverb

Fear

Love & Fear

It's impossible to be in a state of fear and love at the same time!If you can find a way to connect to the feeling of love, your fear will have no room to grow. Read a book or watch a movie that you really love. Talk to someone you care about. Cuddle a pet or a favourite stuffed animal, or look at pictures of your current crush!Let yourself love.

Fear

Quotes:

"Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here." Marianne Williamson

Fear

Put on some feel-good music.

Turn it up and sing along!It's hard to stay scared when you're singing.

Fear

Quote:

"When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe." Henry David Thoreau

Fear

Quote:

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Dr Seuss

Fear

Everybody feels afraid sometimes.

You're not alone. Try not to make it personal. E-motions are just energy in motion. We make this energy into a problem when we make it ours - 'my fear, my rage' etc. Breath, sound and movement are three of the best ways to move energy. Get out have a shout, jump about or do some conscious breathing making sure you breathe out more than you breathe in.

Fear

Quote:

"Courage is not the lack of fear but the ability to face it." Lt. John B. Putnam Jr.

Fear

Try the 'five minute rule'

If you are scared you are going to hurt yourself " “ see if you can resist for just five minutes, then another five minutes, then ten, then twenty.

Fear

Quote:

"Confront your fears, list them, get to know them, and only then will you be able to put them aside and move ahead." Jerry Gillies

Fear

Fear is a natural reaction;

Our bodies sometimes react automatically to things without listening to our heads and hearts!Our hearts might beat fast and our bodies might sweat or tremble at things that could potentially hurt or overwhelm us " “ even if we know we're not really in any danger.Don't be ashamed of being afraid " “ it's just part of being human!

Fear

Quote:

"You are powerful and you are loving and you have nothing to fear"  Susan Jeffers

Anger

Anger

Get moving!

Anger is a strong energetic feeling that often needs to be expressed physically. Put on some loud angry music, and sing and dance and mosh along. Let go!

Anger

Quote:

"To dance is to be out of yourself. Larger, more beautiful, more powerful."Agnes De Mille

Anger

Anger can be healthy.

It doesn't have to lead to aggression. It doesn't have to hurt anyone. It can be expressed and released harmlessly " “ anger can be turned into a powerful, positive force for change!

Anger

Quote:

"Better to live one year as a tiger, then a hundred as sheep."  Madonna

Anger

Name 3 things...

If you're feeling angry at yourself, try to change your focus from being negative to being positive. Name 3 things that you have accomplished, or 3 things that you are proud of, or 3 qualities that you know make you a good person - or just 3 times that you brightened someone elses day.Focus on the positive!

Anger

Quote:

"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." Buddha

Anger

If you are frustrated with yourself

write yourself a letter expressing your frustration.Then write a reply forgiving yourself and giving yourself permission to try again another time.You can tear up the "frustrated"  letter, but keep the forgiving letter for a time in the future when you might need to hear kind words from yourself.

Anger

Quote:

"Genuine forgiveness does not deny anger but faces it head-on" Alice Miller

Anger

It's ok to be angry!

Everyone gets angry from time to time. It's a valid feeling, and you don't need to bottle it up.Bottling up and repressing your feelings does more harm than good!

Anger

Quote:

"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured." Mark Twain

Anger

Vent your anger.

Hit your pillows with your fists or a tennis racket " “ making sure you do not hurt yourself. Take it all out on your pillow!

Anger

Quote:

"Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth." Joan Lunden

Anger

Write a "letter-to-never-send" 

to the person you are angry about. Vent all your feelings, don't worry about how it sounds or what you're writing " “ don't try to make it perfect, just write from your heart.Then, rip the letter up!

Anger

Quote:

"Always write angry letters to your enemies. Never mail them." James Fallows

Anger

Let it all out.

Do something physical or energetic " “ dance, run, shout, swear, jump on the bed!

Anger

Quote:

"When angry, count to ten; when very angry, swear." Mark Twain

Anger

Recognise that you're angry

" “ then make the decision to wait it out. You can't always make the right decision when you're angry; anger can make people act impulsively and do things that they later regret.Decide that you won't do anything or make any big decisions until anger has loosened it's grip on you a little.

Anger

Quote:

"Never do anything when you are in a temper, for you will do everything wrong." Baltasar Gracian

Anger

Cool down

do something refreshing to clear your head!Splash some cold water on your face, take a shower, brush your teeth or take off your makeup. Cleansing, toning and moisturising is a soothing, pampering ritual and might help you to feel calmer.

Anger

Quote:

"If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow." Chinese proverb

Despair

Despair

Spend time in nature

Watch the clouds, lean against a tree, spend some time in the garden. If it's rainy, let it rain on you! If it's windy, let it blow!Be a part of it " “ it will help you to remember where you are from, and what you are an important part of.

Despair

Quote:

"Look at the trees, look at the birds, look at the clouds, look at the stars... and if you have eyes you will be able to see that the whole existence is joyful. Everything is simply happy. Trees are happy for no reason; they are not going to become prime ministers or presidents and they are not going to become rich and they will never have any bank balance. Look at the flowers...it is simply unbelievable how happy flowers are." Osho

Despair

Think of one thing

that you've done that has made a difference to someone " “ no matter how small.Even smiling at a stranger, stroking a stray cat, or paying someone a compliment. You have the power to make people happy, and brighten their whole day.

Despair

Quote:

"When you feel that you have reached the end and that you cannot go one step further,when life seems to be drained of all purpose - what a wonderful opportunity to start all over again, to turn over a new page."Eileen Caddy

Despair

Remind yourself

that everyone feels despair sometimes.You are not alone.

Despair

Quote:

"Life begins on the other side of despair." Jean-Paul Sartre

Despair

Listen to some music that you love.

Line up a playlist of songs that make you feel happy, hopeful, inspired or empowered. Then kick back and listen to the whole lot of them while you keep yourself busy!Things you could do: clean your room, organise your clothes, paint your nails, do some drawing, play a computer game, give yourself a makeover, knit, write a story or make a timetable for your week.

Despair

Quote:

"Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to turn on the light." Albus Dumbledore

Despair

Write a letter

to yourself, from the part of you that feels despairing. Tear it up and put it into the recycling or compost and see that it will be turned into something else.As you tear it up, repeat positive thoughts to yourself such as: "It's no big deal"  "I know I'll be alright"  "Things are getting better already"  or "I'll handle it." 

Despair

Quote:

"The roughest road often leads to the top."  Christina Aguilera

Despair

Be kind to yourself

Treat yourself as though you were your own best friend. Cuddle with a toy or a hot-water bottle, wrap yourself in your duvet and watch your favourite movie. Put on your favourite outfit or wear your favourite perfume. Take a long hot bath and pamper yourself.You deserve to be treated kindly.

Despair

Quote:

"Nothing is so strong as gentleness and nothing is so gentle as real strength."Ralph W. Sockman

Shame

Shame

Shame is when we believe

that there is something wrong with us. This is usually because of what someone else has said or from something that we have read about how people are " ˜supposed' to be.You are you, there is no-one else who can be you and it is impossible for there to truly be something wrong with you. Give yourself the gift of love and acceptance and let go of worrying about what others believe.

Shame

Feeling good about yourself?

Write it down! Dedicate a word document or a notebook to good thoughts and feelings that you have about yourself. List your strengths! List things that you are good at, or things you like about yourself " “ or maybe things that you have done well in the past, and moments when you have been brave or kind or funny.

Shame

Feeling low about yourself?

Visit your good-feelings document or notebook and spend some time with it. Decorate it, change the font colours, doodle in the corners, add new positive feelings and most importantly " “ READ IT! Read it over and over again.The more you read kind and positive thoughts about yourself, the more they sink in and raise your self-esteem.

Shame

Quote:

"Yes - I can put my head up and I can continue." Ashlee Simpson

Shame

Write a "letter-to-never-send" 

to anyone who has treated you as worthless, telling them that you value yourself and don't deserve to be treated this way. Stick up for yourself as though you were defending your best friend or a family member!Don't send the letter " “ rip it up defiantly or type over the whole thing with lyrics that make you feel good about yourself.

Shame

Quote:

"It's not what you call me, but what I answer to." African proverb

Shame

Write out a phrase or lyric that makes you feel great.

Stick it on your mirror. The more you think positive statements, the more they sink in and become true. We can train our brains to think positively, and we can end our negative thoughts and fears by feeding ourselves positive, uplifting messages.

Shame

Quote:

"I used to look in the mirror and feel shame, I look in the mirror now and I absolutely love myself."Drew Barrymore

Shame

Some messages to stick to your mirror:

I am beautiful'/ 'I deserve love' / 'I am getting better all the time'/ 'I can handle anything that comes my way' / 'I am doing good' / 'I love who I am' / 'The past is history.' / 'What matters is right now " “ and right now I am doing great' / 'Every day is a new opportunity' / 'Today is the first day of my new life'/ 'I am a survivor " “ I am strong'/ 'Everything's going to turn out right.'

Shame

Quote:

"Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass... It's about learning how to dance in the rain." Vivian Greene

Shame

Pick a positive thought

and write it out on a piece of paper to keep in your pocket. Whenever you have negative thoughts or you find memories from the past coming back to haunt you, stay strong and pull out your piece of paper. Read your positive thought aloud 5 times, and repeat it to yourself in your head 10 times. You can change your positive thought every day or week if you like, but however dark things get you'll always have comforting words on hand to keep you strong.

Shame

Quote:

"A lotus grows in the mud."  Goldie Hawn

Shame

Remember:

Everyone feels ashamed from time to time. Sometimes we might feel shame or guilt about things that happened in the past " “ sometimes old memories can surface without warning and make us feel miserable or embarrassed. That's normal. Just remember that whatever has happened in the past is over and done with. It's the future and the present that defines who you are as a person" “ not the past.

Shame

Quote:

"Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now in this instant of time. From this moment onwards you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed."  Eileen Caddy

Shame

Everybody makes mistakes.

You're only human. Go easy on yourself, and don't sweat the small stuff.

Shame

Quote:

"Never be ashamed! There's some who'll hold it against you, but they're not worth bothering with." J.K. Rowling

Loneliness

Loneliness

Quote:

"As a teenager I was so insecure. I was the type of guy that never fitted in because he never dared to choose. I was convinced I had absolutely no talent at all. For nothing. And that thought took away all my ambition too." Johnny Depp

Loneliness

Join a group!

Have a look online and in your local papers for weekly meetings, clubs and groups. You might find a protest group, a book club or creative writing club. There are church groups and political groups too " “ get in touch and attend a meeting!Alternatively, there will be chatrooms and online communities passionate about these issues too. Get involved!

Loneliness

Quote:

"It's often just enough to be with someone. I don't need to touch them. Not even talk. A feeling passes between you both. You're not alone." Marilyn Monroe

Loneliness

Write in your diary

Sometimes we're lonely because there's a lot on our minds and we need to talk about it to someone. A quick remedy for easing loneliness is to chat to yourself about what's going on for you! Just vent all your feelings and thoughts out onto the page.Question and investigate your own feelings as you write. What's making you feel this way? Is it true? What makes you think it's true? What would make you feel better right now?

Loneliness

Quote:

"I was never less alone than when by myself." Edward Gibbon

Loneliness

Remind yourself

that feeling lonely can be a normal part of being human. Us humans are very social creatures, and can suffer when we feel like we're alone. Think of all the billions of people in the world who are also feeling lonely right now. Some of them you might know. Lots of them will be celebrities.Take comfort in knowing that you are not alone in feeling alone.

Loneliness

Quote:

"When they are alone they want to be with others, and when they are with others they want to be alone. After all, human beings are like that." Gertrude Stein

Loneliness

Listen to some music

by an artist or group that you love. Music can make us feel like we'll never be alone again! Imagine going to a live gig and being part of a huge audience, everyone reaching out towards the stage and loving the same music.Whether you are actively involved in it or not, you are part of a huge connected family of fans.

Loneliness

Quote:

"He who hears music, feels his solitude peopled at once." Robert Browning

Loneliness

Want to get involved?

Is there something you would like to be part of but feel too scared to join?What would help you to take the first step?

Loneliness

Quote:

"Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around!"  Unknown

Loneliness

List all the people

who have been involved in the journey of you reading this. The person who built your computer, the person who transported it to the shop, the salesperson who sold it, the person who taught you to read, the person who wrote this webpage...Even though they are not with you all these people are connected to your experience in life.

Loneliness

Quote:

"Look at the sky. We are not alone. The whole universe is friendly to us and conspires only to give the best to those who dream and work." Abdul Kalam

Loneliness

Be a fan

Watch a TV series that you know you love. Fall in love with your favourite characters all over again! Go online and find a community or fangroup dedicated to the show. Read posts, download or contribute icons and wallpapers, read some fanfic or draw some fanart.Get connected to a community that feels the same way you do, that can support you to open up to life!

Loneliness

Quote:

"Fandom has done a lot for me. It gave me something to invest in when I was lacking a lot of trust and will in my life; gave me something to look forward to and be excited for...Over and over again, coming and going, fandom has saved my life. And it always will. " Unknown

Loneliness

Phone, email or text someone

Let them know how you are feeling and what you would like. If you don't feel like talking about your feelings, just phone or text someone for a random chat!

Loneliness

Quote:

"A single conversation across the table with a wise person is worth a month's study of books" Chinese proverb

Loneliness

Volunteer for something

Pick a charity that you're interested in. Then, go for it! Just go along and do your best. You'll meet new people, and experience new things.You will have done something a bit scary, and so expanded your own comfort zone " “ you'll come home feeling brave and confident.You'll also have done a good thing, and used your time and energy in helping others.

Worry and anxiety

Worry and anxiety

Pamper yourself

Take a long, hot bath, using all of your favourite bath products. When you're out, put on your comfiest clothes and apply some of your favourite perfume or bodyspray. Paint your nails. Blowdry your hair and style it differently.Take it slow, and just focus on making yourself feel comfy, clean and pampered.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"Nothing is impossible. The word itself says 'i'm possible!'" Audrey Hepburn

Worry and anxiety

Do something to relax yourself

Maybe take a long walk, or wrap yourself up in your duvet and watch a favourite movie or TV series. Make yourself a hot water bottle and cuddle up to it.Take good care of yourself!

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"We do not see things as they are; we see them as we are." The Talmud

Worry and anxiety

Slow down.

Take some deep breaths. On the out breath make a sound to release some of the worry.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself." Paulo Coelho

Worry and anxiety

Write a list

of any decisions you want to make, or any things you need to get done. You might have a lot on your plate and it can seem so overwhelming, but it all becomes a lot more manageable when it's written down in a list.Then you can prioritize everything and work out what you need to do first.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live." J.K. Rowling

Worry and anxiety

Reach out.

See if you can think of someone that you could ask for help. Maybe a family member, a friend or a counsellor.Try looking online for communities and forums that might be able to help make you feel less worried.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"Everything is practise." Pel

Worry and anxiety

All you can do is your best.

Your best is good enough, and can't be anything but good enough.Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"Sometimes the paths we take are long and hard, but remember: those are the ones that lead to the most beautiful views." Unknown

Worry and anxiety

Pick a positive thought

and write it out on a piece of paper to keep in your pocket. Whenever you get worried or feel anxious, you'll know that you can always reach into your pocket and read that positive thought.You can change your positive thought every day or every week if you like, but however dark things get you'll always have comforting words on hand to keep you strong.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"Don't worry about a thing, Cause every little thing gonna be all right." Bob Marley

Worry and anxiety

Physically relax.

Untense all your muscles, and pay attention to how it feels. Imagine a warm glow spreading downwards through your body from your head to the tips of your toes. Imagine the glow becoming warmer on every slow, relaxed in-breath. Imagine all of your stress and tension flowing out of you on every slow, relaxed out-breath. Picture all your tension floating up and away from you like a black cloud being blown away.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"You can't always control what goes on outside. But you can always control what goes on inside." Wayne Dyer

Worry and anxiety

Remember:

Your anxiety is just a feeling. Remember that it won't last long, and won't last forever.

Worry and anxiety

Quote:

"When you're feeling anxious, remember that you're still you. You are not anxiety. Whenever you feel otherwise, remember that's just the anxiety talking. You are still you and hold the power in every moment." Deanne Repich

Worry and anxiety

Imagine what you would say

If a good friend told you that she was worried about something. Comfort and reassure yourself in the same way " “ be kind to yourself and be your own best friend.

Self-hate

Self-hate

Feel in your body

where the feelings of self-hatred are. You might feel like they're a knot in your stomach, or a lump in your throat, or a heavy feeling in your heart.Close your eyes and then shout or scream from that place. Imagine you're shouting all the self hate out of you " “ you might want to scream into a pillow or you might prefer to shout at the world!

Self-hate

Quote:

"You can't look back; you have to keep looking forward." Lucy Liu

Self-hate

Beat up your pillow

with a tennis racquet or pummel it with your fists. Go outside and kick a ball around, dance, or go for a run.Release all of your bad feelings safely.

Self-hate

Quote:

"Everything will be okay. You are beautiful, and it is far more than skin-deep. Let it shine."  Unknown

Self-hate

Remember

that it is possible to change your thinking and stop your feelings of self-hatred.You can love yourself.And when you do you will look back on today with a smile and a wish that you could give yourself a hug.

Self-hate

Quote:

"Sometimes the paths we take are long and hard, but remember: those are the ones that lead to the most beautiful views."Unknown

Self-hate

Imagine what you would say

If a good friend told you that she hated herself. Comfort and reassure yourself in the same way " “ be kind to yourself and be your own best friend.

Self-hate

Write out a list

of who else you may be angry with. Self-hatred is often anger turned in.Sometimes it feels easier for people to hate themselves rather than the people who hurt or let them down.

Self-hate

Quote:

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Dr Seuss

Self-hate

Don't feed yourself negative thoughts.

You might notice bad thoughts about yourself popping into your head. Notice when they do, and challenge them.Every time you catch those self-hating thoughts sneaking up on you, think to yourself "No, that's not true." 

Self-hate

Quote:

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring"  Marilyn Monroe

Self-hate

Outdo each bad thought

with a positive thought about yourself."I am a great person."  "I deserve to be happy."  "I know I'm doing just fine."  "Every day I'm getting better." It doesn't matter if you don't believe it right now " “ it's true. The more you say it to yourself, the more you'll grow in confidence.

Self-hate

Quote:

"You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."Christopher Robin

Self-hate

Write a list of things you like about yourself.

If you like the colour of your eyes, write it down. Maybe you like yourself for being imaginative, or loyal " “ maybe you know you're a good listener, or great with animals, or intelligent. Whatever comes to mind, write it down.Keep the list somewhere special, and add to it whenever you have a good thought about yourself.

Self-hate

Quote:

"When people don't believe in you, you have to believe in yourself." Pierce Brosnan

Sadness

Sadness

Phone or text someone you trust

and tell them how you're feeling. Ask them for some support.You might feel like you need to vent about your feelings, or you might just want to take your mind off them and cheer yourself up with a long, random chat.

Sadness

Quote:

"Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to turn on the light." Albus Dumbledore

Sadness

Accept it.

Accept that you feel sad right now, and remember that it's a natural feeling.Everyone feels like this from time to time.This feeling won't last forever.

Sadness

Quote:

"It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness."Eleanor Roosevelt

Sadness

Get comfy

with a hot water bottle. Hold it close and let the heat comfort you.

Sadness

Quote:

"I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing." Agatha Christie

Sadness

Ask for help.

Send a text or email message asking for support.

Sadness

Quote:

"Human beings are not designed to go through life alone. No one has to bear the burden of the tough times all by themselves."Jack Canfield

Sadness

It's okay to cry.

Have a good cry if you need to! Crying releases toxins that can build up in our bodies due to stress.It lowers our stress levels, and helps us to release our pent-up emotions and feelings.

Sadness

Quote:

"All these feelings need to be felt. We need to stomp and storm; to sob and cry; to perspire and tremble." John Bradshaw

Control

Control

Quote:

"Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful." William Morris

Control

Write a list

of any decisions you want to make, or any things you need to get done. You might have a lot on your plate and it can seem overwhelming, but it all becomes a lot more manageable when it's written down in a list.Then you can prioritize everything and work out what you need to do first.

Control

Quote:

"Confront your fears, list them, get to know them, and only then will you be able to put them aside and move ahead."Jerry Gillies

Control

Find something that works for you

Most people need to feel in control in a life that changes a lot - find something that will give you a feeling of being in control.

Control

Quote:

"Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly" Robert H. Schuller

Control

Relax.

Experiment with some methods of relaxation, like meditation or breathing techniques.Give yourself time to relax and unwind " “ learn to let go.

Control

Quote:

"Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are." Chinese Proverb

Control

Take care of something.

Find something to look after " “ something that needs care, and routine. Keep a fish, or raise a tank of sea monkeys.Grow a plant from a seedling, or buy a beautiful bonsai tree to tend to and look after.

Control

Quote:

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."Dalai Lama

Control

Make some noise

Find somewhere that you can make a loud noise and have a scream. Scream into a pillow if you want to.

Control

Quote:

"Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successfull personality and duplicate it."Bruce Lee

Control

A tidy mind

Do some tidying up and put some of your things into order.Do the washing up, organise your clothes, or clean up your desk area.

Control

Quote:

"Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world."George Bernard Shaw

Control

Donate to charity

Collect up all your old clothes, books or CDs that you don't want any more. Donate them to a clothes bank, or take them to a charity shop of your choice.You'll have cleared up some clutter and made a tidier place for yourself, but you'll also feel good knowing that you're helping a good cause.